Truth Be Told
by CraftySlytherin
Summary: What happens when the kings of pranking, Fred and George Weasley, spike a shipment of pumpkin juice bound for Hogwarts with Truth Serum? A day full of true confessions.


Truth Be Told 

It was another deadly dull day in Diagon Alley. George Weasley stood at the counter of he and Fred's shop, Weasleys Wizarding Wheezes, doing the books. They had made quite a profit since they had opened. Sufficed to say, Fred and George Weasley were well off. George let out a sigh of boredom as he tallied the next column of earnings and expenditures. "We have the money, we should hire someone to do this," George thought to himself. It was then that George's twin brother Fred walked in from the storeroom in back, hauling a load of Skivving Snackboxes.

"What's the matter, Georgey Porgey? Are all of those numbers melting your brain?"

"Now that you mention it, I could think of a billion other ways I'd rather be spending my time. Why don't we hire someone to do this bookwork for us?"

"Don't worry, brother dear, we will…all in good time. Until then, just think happy thoughts. For instance, I wonder what the poor student body of Hogwarts is doing for comic relief now that we're not there."

George smiled, fondly remembering their days at Hogwarts. "It would be great to be able to do something to liven things up there. No one was as brilliant as us at pranking. Maybe we could come up with something."

At that moment, a short, fat wizard pushing a cart full of barrels stopped in front of Fred and George's store. Checking to make sure the barrels were secure, he entered the shop. "Hey, would it be alright with you two if I leave these barrels of pumpkin juice out here for a few minutes? I've got to get this delivery made, but if I don't get some lunch, I'll waste away to nothing."

Fred was quick to answer. "Sure, no problem. We'll keep an eye on it. If you don't mind me asking, who's the delivery for?"

The man pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and mopped his forehead. "This shipment is for Hogwarts school. They sure do go through a lot of pumpkin juice up there! Anyways, I shouldn't be more than about twenty minutes. I really appreciate this." The man stuffed the handkerchief back into his pocket and walked away to get some lunch.

A scheming look came upon Fred's face. "Did you hear that, Georgey? That pumpkin juice is for the students at Hogwarts. Do we still have some of that truth potion in the back that we were using for our new product?"

George quickly caught on to Fred's idea. "Yes…yes we do. There's about ten bottles left. If I'm thinking what you're thinking, which I usually am, then you're a genius. Let's get to work, we only have twenty minutes."

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"Wow! This pumpkin juice is great!" Ron exclaimed, downing his third glass. Ron, Harry, and Hermione were seated at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall, enjoying their breakfast before classes.

Hermione took a long drink of her own juice. "You're right, Ron. For some reason it seems to taste even better than it usually does. Maybe they're getting it from a new supplier."

Harry looked around the Great Hall. "It looks like everyone else is really enjoying it too. I don't think I've ever seen everyone go through quite so much pumpkin juice. Even the teachers really seem to be enjoying it."

All of a sudden, Professor McGonagall stood up at the staff table and smacked Professor Snape across the face, leaving a red handprint on his cheek. "I'll have you know, Severus, that I do indeed prefer men. Honestly, I don't know what would make you say such a thing. You have loads of room to talk! I think maybe YOU prefer men as well!" With that being said, Professor McGonagall stormed out of the Great Hall, leaving behind a flabbergasted Professor Snape.

Harry looked in shock at his two friends. "Maybe we should be getting to class. Things are getting a little weird in here." Ron and Hermione nodded their heads in agreement, and the trio gathered up their things and headed out of the Great Hall. As they headed down the corridor to their first class, Ginny ran out of the Great Hall to catch up with them.

"Hey you three, did you just see that in there? Was that odd or what!"

"Yeah, Ginny, that's why we left early." Ron whipped his head back and forth, looking first at Harry, and then at Ginny. "You know, you two would make a cute couple. I mean, Ginny's had the hots for you since her first year. She's always drawing your name down and putting little hearts around it. She's also available, since Dean broke up with her cause she wouldn't let him get past first base." Ron suddenly realized what he'd said, and his eyes grew wide.

"I'm SO sorry! I don't know why I said that, it just came out!"

Harry, who'd steadily been growing a deep shade of red while Ron was talking, nodded his head. "I agree, Ron. I DO think that Ginny's gotten quite cute. I wouldn't mind having a go at her. But I think that you and Hermione should be honest as well. You two fancy each other so much, and everyone in the school's noticed but you two." Harry looked quite astonished at the words that had just come out of his mouth.

Hermione noticed that Ginny looked quite uncomfortable. "Okay, you two, we should probably get to class. You've both thoroughly embarrassed Ginny by the look of it. Besides, I can't be late for Potions. You know that school and books are my life. Well, apart from my secret ambition to snog Ron in a broom closet before the end of the year." Hermione quickly clapped her hand over her mouth and ran in the direction of the dungeons. Harry and Ron muttered a quick goodbye to Ginny and followed Hermione.

As they walked quickly away, Ginny called after them. "See you later, Harry and Ron! Harry, if you'd like to you can kiss me after classes are over!"

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Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat next to each other in their usual seats in Potions. All three of them were silent, as they were afraid to say anything. Draco Malfoy entered the classroom, pausing in front of their table. "You know, Granger, I've always had a thing for you. I call you lots of terrible names, but that's just to cover up my true feelings. I really think you're a sexy little minx, and I'd like a chance to run my hands over your bottom." Draco looked horrified at what he'd just said.

Hermione stood up and looked Draco in the eyes. "Well, Draco, I have to admit that I think you're pretty sexy as well. But your mouth totally screws it up. I'm sure that you're a great shag, but the only person I want to run their hands over my bottom is Ron." Hermione again clapped a hand over her mouth and sat back down.

"I'll run my hands over your bottom any time you want," Ron said earnestly.

Hermione tried to fight the urge to speak, but found herself unable to. "Okay, Ron, how about after class? It'll be great, I'm sure. Maybe I'll run my hands over your bottom as well."

Professor Snape entered the classroom, the handprint still clear on his face. "Mr. Malfoy, please take your seat. You may be my favorite student, but that doesn't mean I don't think you're a spoiled brat."

"Sorry, Professor," Draco said as he took his seat. "I was just trying to get Granger to make out with me."

"Thank you for your blunt honesty, Mr. Malfoy," Snape said, shaking his head. "Today we will be making truth potion. The instructions are all written down on the board. Work quickly and quietly, as I have a rather large headache from being slapped. At the end of class, bring forward a vial of what you have in your cauldron and leave it on my desk. If you have any questions please keep them to yourself, as I will be busy looking at my newest copy of Playwitch." Professor Snape drew a long breath and fell to his seat. Ron thrust his hand up into the air and waved it around wildly. "Yes, Mr. Weasley?"

"Well, Professor, I was wondering if you ever wash your hair. It's always so greasy and stringy looking. I've always wanted to know."

"No, Mr. Weasley, I don't wash my hair. I find it to be a great nuisance. I will now give you a week of detentions for asking. Your detentions will start tomorrow night, as I will be quite busy sorting my sock and underwear drawer tonight, and writing a letter to my gran."

Harry, Ron, and Hermione tried hard to work on their truth potions in silence, but Hermione could no longer stand it. "Something strange is going on. If I didn't know any better, I'd say everyone in school has somehow had some truth potion. Everyone appears to be having trouble keeping their mouths shut. We've got to find a way to stop this, before I open my big mouth and tell Ron how I'd like him to run his fingers through my hair and suck on my toes." Hermione smacked herself on the forehead with the heel of her hand, vowing to not say another word.

"Don't be embarrassed, 'Mione. I'd like nothing better than to suck on your toes. Well, except for maybe running my hands over your bottom."

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The trio managed to make it through the rest of Potions without saying a word. After class, they put their vials up on Professor Snape's desk and quickly exited the classroom. Their vow of silence was broken as they made their way to Transfiguration, and again ran into Ginny. As they passed her, Harry couldn't help but open his mouth.

"Hey, Ginny. I'm really looking forward to that kiss after classes."

Ginny smiled back at Harry over her shoulder. "I am too, Harry. You can even stick your tongue in my mouth if you want," Ginny said, suddenly going red in the face.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione made their way to Professor McGonagall's classroom without saying another word. As her class entered, Professor McGonagall cleared her throat loudly. "I'd like to start off class by saying that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for my part in that little scene in the Great Hall this morning. Just to clear things up, I really do prefer men. As a matter of fact, I've been secretly carrying on with Professor Dumbledore for years. Now please take your seats and turn to page seventy-five in your books. Today we'll be transforming buttons into spiders."

Just as he had in Potions, Ron thrust his hand up in the air and began to wave it wildly. "Professor, before we start I just want to tell you that I won't be able to successfully do what you ask. Although I'd never admit it, I'm very terrified of spiders. They really creep me out."

"Thank you for your honesty, Mr. Weasley. I will have to give you a zero, and a detention for calling out in class without being recognized first. You will have to serve your detention one night next week though. I'm afraid I've booked a liaison with Professor Dumbledore for every night this week." Professor McGonagall looked mortified, and dropped her head into her hands. "You may begin working on your transfigurations. I will be around to check your work as soon as I can compose myself."

Again, the trio managed to make it through the rest of class without speaking. Professor McGonagall also maintained silence, except for one incident. Draco began telling Crabbe and Goyle that they were really quite stupid and about how disappointed he was that Hermione didn't want to make out with him. She quickly gave all three of them detentions, and then dismissed class ten minutes early after checking everyone's work.

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Harry, Ron, and Hermione slowly made their way to their last class before lunch. They had Care of Magical Creatures with Slytherin. As they crossed the castle grounds towards Hagrid's hut, Draco Malfoy fell in step beside them.

"Granger, I really do wish you would reconsider. I've been told I'm actually quite good with my hands. I'd like the chance to prove it to you."

"Sorry, Draco, I really DO think you have a rather well put together body, but right now I'm obsessing over Ron. I'd like to see if he's good with HIS hands. But if things don't work out, I'll keep you in mind." For about the hundredth time that day, Hermione clapped her hand over her mouth.

"Don't worry, 'Mione," Ron said, turning red. "I promise you that I won't give you the chance to keep Malfoy in mind. I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm rather good with my hands as well."

As the Gryffindors and Slytherins gathered around Hagrid, he gestured to a large crate which held about twenty grey-colored lobsters with green spots. "Mackled Malaclaws; thas what we'll be studyin' on these firs' few weeks. I won' sugar coat it an' tell you that these little buggers aren' dangerous. If yeh get bitten, yeh'll have bad luck for up to a week. If yeh try an' eat 'em, yeh'll run a fever an' break out in a green rash." As he had in every class that morning, Ron raised his hand and whipped it about. "Yes, Ron?"

"Thank you for being honest about these creatures. Usually you bring in dangerous things and don't tell us that they are actually dangerous. Now let's get started. I'm hungry and want to get to lunch. I also have plans to play footsies with Hermione while we eat."

Draco raised his hand, and Hagrid nodded in his direction. "Professor, may I be excused? Even though I think this class is a joke, I'm actually terrified of all of the creatures you have us studying, and these things are no exception. Also, I'm depressed because Granger won't make out with me."

Hagrid again nodded at Draco. "Sure yeh can go, Malfoy. I'd ruther not have yeh aroun' anyhow. Yeh're quite a pain in the arse." Hagrid looked confused for a moment, as Draco headed back up to the castle. "So yeh wouldn' make out with him, Hermione? Well, I can't say I blame yeh. It's so obvious tha' yeh'd rather make out with Ron."

Hermione was definitely having trouble controlling her traitorous mouth. "Yes, Hagrid, you're quite right. To me, Ron looks like a big bar of chocolate, and I just want to lick him all over. Now please explain these terribly ugly creatures to us."

Ron looked as if he was in pain with the struggle to keep quiet. He leaned over to Hermione and whispered, "I'd like to lick you all over as well." Ron closed his eyes and shook his head.

Hagrid continued on with the lesson, noticing that most of the students wouldn't speak or ask questions. Somewhere inside, Hagrid knew that something was not quite right. Every class he'd had today had students blurting out things he couldn't believe. He also found himself giving out information about the creatures they were studying that he normally didn't think to. As the class was ending, Hagrid approached Ron, Harry, and Hermione. "You three be careful now. Somethin' dodgy is goin' on," Hagrid warned them.

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Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat at their usual spots in the Great Hall for lunch. Not long after, Ginny joined them. "Hi, you three. Colin's just asked me to join his Harry Potter Fan Club. I told him I couldn't possibly. I told him I had plans for a snogging session with Harry later and didn't want to do anything to embarrass him. You know, Harry, your eyes really ARE as green as freshly pickled toad." Ginny dropped her head to the table in mortification.

Harry patted her on the back reassuringly. "Don't worry about it, Ginny, I quite appreciate the compliment. Now don't forget…meet me in the second floor broom closet after classes. And might I just say, you have the cutest little nose." Harry scrunched his eyes closed tight at his choice of words. Before anyone else could say anything, Professor Dumbledore called for everyone's attention.

"As most of you have probably noticed, our school seems to be under attack by some type of prankster; someone who thought it would be funny to spike the pumpkin juice with some truth serum. Professor Snape and myself have personally tested the pumpkin juice from earlier, and are pleased to announce that the effects should wear off within a few hours. Until then, we will serve water with lunch. I ask all students to please try their hardest to watch what they say. At times it may be unavoidable, and the urge to speak the truth will overcome you. Like right now I find myself hard-pressed not to mention to the entire student body, that your Transfiguration professor has a rather cute little freckle on her right buttock. Now, let's all enjoy our lunch and remember, try very hard not to speak unless it's absolutely necessary."

Harry's eyes grew wide at Dumbledore's little slip of the tongue. "I can't believe it's affecting Dumbledore too! At least it will wear off in a few hours. Ginny, I rather like that thing you're doing to my leg. PLEASE don't stop!"

Ron looked at Harry suspiciously. "All right, mate, I know I told you that you and Ginny would make a cute couple, but can't you contain yourselves at the table?"

"Well, Ron, that's not stopping you from running your foot up my leg, so you don't have much room to talk," Hermione told Ron earnestly.

The Great Hall remained silent for the most part, with only an occasional outbreak of truth blurting. Due to the quietness, anytime anything was said it could be plainly heard by all. Seamus Finnigan could plainly be heard telling Parvati Patil that since twins share everything, they could share him. Parvati soundly slapped him across the face, and then apologetically told Seamus that she would ask Padma if she was up for it. Neville Longbottom told anyone who would listen, that he was much smarter than all of them about plants. Luna Lovegood purposefully strode over to the Slytherin table and planted a big, wet kiss on Draco. She then informed him that she would love to know what color knickers he had on. Draco nodded, and told her that if he didn't achieve his goal of getting Hermione into a broom closet by the end of the day, that he'd keep her in mind.

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Harry, Ron, and Hermione quickly gobbled down their lunch so that they could escape from the madness before it struck them again. Their next class was Herbology, again with the Slytherins, so they made their way to the greenhouses in silence. Once the entire class was assembled, Professor Sprout began her explanation of the lesson.

"Keeping Dumbledore's little announcement in mind, I've decided to give you something easy to do. The Flutterby bushes need pruning, so you'll pair up in twos and get it done. I realize this may seem extraordinarily boring, but I'm trying to give you all something to do while I have a bit of firewhiskey. I keep it right here in a hipflask under my robes so no one notices. But honestly, I have to have something to dull the neverending questions I get from first years. Now hop to it!"

Ron and Hermione quickly paired up, and Draco shoved his way over to partner with Harry. Harry glanced warily at him as he approached. "Okay, Malfoy, I have to say I'm really freaked out right now with you wanting to be my partner."

"No worries, Potter. I just came to be your partner so I could be closer to Granger. I don't have any plans to do anything to you until tomorrow. You may want to avoid the third floor corridor, as I'll be waiting on the floor above you to drop a dungbomb on your head."

"Well, thanks for the warning, Malfoy."

"No problem, Potter, my pleasure," Draco said, while struggling to get his hands over his traitorous mouth. He leaned over towards Hermione. "Hey, Granger, have you given any more thought to my offer? I've found a nice broom closet we can use. I'll even let you spank me if you want."

Hermione rolled her eyes at Draco. "Listen, Draco, once and for all. I think you're very shagadelic, but it's Ron who really gets me randy. As a matter of fact, I'd like to rip open his robes right now and run my hands all over his chest."

Ron, who was listening to their conversation, raised his hand in the air and jumped up and down. Professor Sprout stuffed her hipflask back into her robes, and asked Ron what he wanted. "Can we please be dismissed early, Professor Sprout? Hermione is saying some things over here that are really getting me worked up. I'm afraid I'll cut a finger off with these pruning shears in my clumsy, flustered state." Professor Sprout sighed heavily and dismissed the class twenty minutes early.

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As Harry, Ron, and Hermione made their way down the corridor to their last class of the day, they noticed the stillness in the air. It seemed that many students had cast Silencing Charms on themselves to prevent further embarrassment. "That's a pretty good idea," Hermione remarked. "I don't think I'll do it to myself though. I've kept so many things pent up for so long that it's probably healthy that I'm getting them all out. It's fun to say things that make Ron's ears go red, he's even cuter that way."

Harry shook his head, as he patted Ginny on the bottom in passing and the trio entered the Charms classroom. Professor Flitwick stood on his usual stack of books to make himself taller. As the rest of the class filed in, he began.

"I've decided to have you all review some of the charms we've gone over in past years for the first few weeks. There are quite a few dunderheads in this class who never seemed to get them all. Today we'll be working on Cheering charms. I daresay you could all use one with the way this day is going. I've never in my life heard so many true confessions! Well, unless you count the time Professor Trelawny got drunk and confessed to me that she isn't really a true Seer and just pretends most of the time. Now, let's get to work."

Ron raised his hand in the air, waving so wildly that he almost knocked Harry's glasses off. "Professor, I was wondering if Crabbe and Goyle are the dunderheads you're talking about. They really are quite thick-headed. Also, I'd rather spend my class time sketching Hermione's name on my parchment and staring at her breasts."

"Yes, Mr. Weasley. Crabbe and Goyle are the dunderheads to which I'm referring. And frankly I don't care what you do in class today. I'll just be glad for the day to be over with."

Most of the class paired up and began work on their charms. Draco again partnered up with Potter. "I certainly don't want to be stuck with dunderheads. Hey, Granger, this is the last offer I'm making. Do you want to take a ride on the Malfoy Express, or not?"

Hermione shook her head in exasperation. "I already told you no, Malfoy, you sexy beast. I'd rather ride the rails with Ron any day."

"Alright, Hermione," Ron said slowly. "Let's ditch the rest of class and find us a spare broom closet."

Hermione shook her head as if trying to clear her mind. The effects of the doctored pumpkin juice had finally worn off. The realizations of all she'd said that day hit her like a ton of bricks. With an embarrassed glance at Ron, she fled from the classroom.

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It was the end of another successful day of sales for Fred and George Weasley. As they pulled supplies from the storeroom to restock shelves, they couldn't help but wonder how the day had gone for the students at Hogwarts.

"So what do you think, brother dear? Do you think they had an interesting day?" George asked.

"To say the least!" Fred exclaimed.

"It's too bad we couldn't be there to watch our latest brilliant scheme," George said with disappointment.

"Well, George, I only have one thing to say. Ten bottles of truth potion…fifteen galleons. The knowledge that we're still the kings of pranks at Hogwarts…priceless!"

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A/N: The info on Mackled Malaclaws came from Fantastic Beasts. I hope everyone enjoyed! This is my first story on so please review and tell me what you thought! And if you read this and recognize it, that's because I have it on two other websites.


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